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America Should Get Rid of Pennies: A Personal Peeve of Tanya’s and Tessie’s
Can you remember the last time you used a penny? Or even the last time you saw a penny? Of course you can, because everything in this fucking country costs like 99 cents and then you get stuck with the worthless penny. When we were kids we kept a penny jar and we saved so much that we were able to buy “The Legend of Zelda” for Nintendo, and then pennies were awesome. But now they suck. If you keep a change purse then your pennies just overtake everything else and if a situation arises where you need an actual unit of currency, like, say, a quarter, then you have to wade through all of the pennies you've amassed until you eventually find the one quarter hidden at the bottom.
Also, pennies make the math hard. If you go to a restaurant and the total is $15.03, how do you divide it? And can you really divide $15.03 by two off the top of your head? Wow, I definitely can't.
And you know what else? Most countries don't even have pennies. They just round their prices off. And sometimes Tanya has soooo many pennies that she just throws them in the garbage. She just has sooo many.
So in conclusion, Tessie, Tanya and I all say that pennies should be abolished and that everything should cost some multiple of a nickel. And that, my friends, is my 5 cents on the issue (ha ha!).
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